Frida Allander
To my future love,
I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about your life, your journey, your laughter, your tears. I’ve been thinking a lot about the times I’ve been told I love too hard, that I’m too romantic, too devoted, too soft, too loyal, too kind. I’ve been thinking a lot about how it’s broken me to pieces. I’ve been thinking a lot about creating subdued versions of myself to fit the norm. I’ve been thinking a lot about holding back. About learning how to love less, with less passion, devotion, certainty and grit. But most of all I’ve been thinking a lot about you. I’ve been thinking about the version of me you deserve. I’ve been thinking a lot about changing, but thoughts of you somehow always stop me dead in my tracks. Your existence has my entirety overflowing with warmth, tenderness and hope. Maybe we’ve already met. Maybe we’ve never crossed paths. Maybe we’re one step closer to finding our way. Wherever you are, I hope you’re not making a home out of someone whose absence makes you feel displaced, yet whose presence still leaves you empty. I hope you feel heard and understood. I hope you feel loved, unconditionally, beyond compare. Wherever you are, I want you to know I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately. I’ve been thinking a lot about never holding anything back for you. I’ve been thinking a lot about your heart, and how I long to cradle and protect it like it’s my own. I’ve been thinking a lot about your soul, and how I yearn to feed and nourish it to no end. My love, I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately, and I’m patiently waiting for you to find your way home.
